GORE SHOULD RUN AS AN INDEPENDENT -- PLAIN AND SIMPLE

"Pin your ear to the wisdom post ..." So sings Tom Waits, in the tune that best explicates the confounding, infuriating insanity in which our so-called individual consciousnesses are imprisoned, Get Behind The Mule. This is, naturally, a matter of opinion. And that's fine. Really, where would we be if we didn't have the foul brute of opinion out there, fucking everything up beyond all hope?

There's no need to even attempt to answer such a stupid question.

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So here we are, stumbling and staggering amid our flummoxed flounderings, hopelessly searching for even a glimpse of the wisdom post, which will probably never happen. Not in the deathly arid intellectual environment we've allowed to be imposed on ourselves, at any rate. Anyway, for what little it's worth, here's my latest foray behind the mule, a hope-deprived toss of a few pennies into the putrid wishing-well of despair we've been tap-dancing around for the past seven (very long) years. And it is this: now that Al Gore has won the Nobel Prize, he should immediately announce his candidacy for President -- as an independent. No party machine, no DLC, no corporate compromises, just Al. What a dramatic, seismic upheaval that would cause; a gonad-tightening, sphincter-clenching paradigm shift of epic proportions. It'd almost be enough for me to actually give a shit about the debased electoral system in this sad, ridiculous country of ours.

Ah, but the discomfiting panic that would overwhelm the feeble corporate hacks at the helm of the shabbily leaking garbage scow that is the Democratic Party, in the audacious face of an independent Gore run, would surely be a sight to see. The highly entertaining turmoil that would ensue among this crime gang, these closeted neo-cons desperate to inherit Bush’s "unitary executive" mantle -- what an utterly priceless spectacle that'd be. To see Hillary's towering ambition to wield the unconstitutional powers that have been so deliberately crafted for chucklehead George go up in a puff of smoke, like the existential ass gas that it is, at least would give us something to laugh about when we're finally all transported to the nearest Halliburton-approved concentration camp. Hardy har.

But, I can hear the Kosmaniac dead-enders bleat in a horrified ejaculation of dismay, an independent run by Gore would disastrously split the Democratic vote, thereby ensuring a Republican electoral victory next year! To which I answer: so the fuck what? The Democratic "leadership" in Congress has already shown, well beyond a reasonable doubt, that they're fully on-board with the wider neo-con project -- their adamant refusal, in the face of public discontent and an enormous mountain of rather obvious criminal activity, to remove the most thoroughly corrupt administration in US history, pretty much proves this to be the case. They want all this extra-constitutional power for themselves, to replace their Republican cohorts as corporate-sponsored arbiters of the privatized death-wheel profit machine, the primary motivating engine propelling this whole catastrophic neo-con experiment. Would a President Hillary, as completely and enthusiastically in the corporate bag as any American politician has ever been, seriously consider curtailing or rolling back the abusive policies and precedents set by the present administration? You don't really believe that, do you? Come on, already.

Logic would seem to indicate that Gore doesn't owe much in the way of loyalty to the Democratic Party; after all, it was the party that foisted Lieberman on him in 2000, and has been at the forefront of the Vichyite appeasement of the neo-cons ever since. He's more than proven that he hardly needs the debilitating albatross of a compromised political apparatus strung around his neck, dragging him back down into the filth and puke -- you know, the natural habitat of the political animal. Gore has achieved heaps more than he ever could have, or did, as a captive member of a completely wasted political system. That's why he would be the perfect anti-party candidate, in a manner of speaking: he's redeemed himself about as well as any major politician ever has, is involved with issues of critical importance to the very survival of the planet and its monumentally misguided human inhabitants, and has reached a plateau of personal stature that no machine politician can hope to match. He's the one person who might be able to yank this corrupted pustule of a nation back from the brink of extinction ... so long as he doesn't run as an "official" Democrat. If he runs as a Democrat, he's owned, again. It's just that simple.

Well, you can all relax, you supercilious sniffers of Hillary's bloomers, or you moronic miscreants who actually believe that Barack Obama or John Edwards or any of the other nitwits have something important to say: Gore won't run, under apparently any circumstances. More's the pity. Instead of the one individual who might possibly save this "democratic republic" from itself -- Gore would at least try to -- we’ll probably be afflicted with Unitary Hillary and her superficially modulated version of neo-con fucktardery. So will end the buffoon epoch, the Bush period of the neo-con make-over of America, to be replaced by perhaps the far more dangerous, much less intellectually-challenged Hillary edition. Al, shorn of the useless baggage of party affiliation, is -- or would be -- the only thing standing in her way ...

Oh hell -- so much for the wisdom post. Run Al, run. You're our only hope ...